Tag Archives: Life

Why I feel old.

Because I can clearly remember things that happened 30 years ago.
Because my first computer had a 200MB hard drive and my current one has a 4TB one.
Because things inexplicably ache.
Because I think about it enough to put a list of things like this.
Because everyone else I know, even those some 10 years younger, are doing the same thing.
Because I bitch about the cost of things going up while the quality of things goes down.
Because I can remember record stores, video stores and arcades fondly.
Because I can remember large, loud cars made out of a lot of metal and chrome.
Because I am, whether I choose to realize it or not, middle-aged.

I’ve been in ready-to-assemble furniture hell the past couple days. I also played video games until I fell asleep on the couch last night. Which wasn’t as late as it’s been in the past, but still…the coupling of the two makes me feel like I’m in college again.

Looking forward to the games that are coming out this year. Bioshock 3, Resident Evil 6 and a few more. And now that our studio has a dedicated gaming lounge it’ll be much more fun.

Babies, marriage and death

I’ve been to my share of funerals, but never planned one. I’ve been to a few weddings and planned one. I’ve had one planned baby. With that, I’ve experienced-or been witness to- the extreme costs that these three events can generate for those involved. My wedding was small, not necessarily on the cheap side, but by no means extravagant. Having only one grandparent left, I’ve been on the business end of three funerals and got familiar with the costs involved through my parents. Although these two events differ from the third (a baby) they are not necessarily cheaper.

As I’ve made somewhat of an attempt to become a more practical consumer in recent years, unfortunately I’ve entered a new phase of consumer spending-baby goods. Luckily, the beginning of this journey was set off with a proper shower that took care of quite a few necessities. We’ve also been the recipient of many generous packages filled with baby clothes and other items that would normally have a heavy price tag-strollers, seats, a crib. For those in the know, there’s nothing baby goods manufacturers like to better while they say “congratulations,” is charge you an extra fifty bucks for something that you’ll most likely use for a couple months, or just break without warning. So, if you’re not in the know, consider this a warning.

Different items for babies vary in price in a simliar way that adult goods do, but with a twist. Typically, cheaper items meant for adults tend to last a little longer than the act of removing them from the package or wrapper; baby good on the other hand, not so much. There are a few items that were purchased for said baby that were the cheaper version of whatever item we were in the market for, this turned out to be a bit of a mistake. The items in question were not high-ticket items but did come with an expectation to work-even if only for a reasonable amount of time. The other problem with these items is that sometimes, even if the product that was purchased does indeed appear to work, you may find out that it’s not working well or even at all. The baby goods market is filled with these types of products. Unfortunately, this does not help the psyche of the already nervous parents.

So far, we’ve had good luck with Eddie Bauer, Medela and Fisher-Price branded items, so-so luck with Evenflo items and horrible luck with anything branded Babies-R-Us. I accept that there’s some chance involved with buying retail products in general, but Babies-R-Us won’t be getting any visits from us in the near future.

Life moves by pretty fast …

I can’t say that I’ve ever been truly depressed. I’ve had a pretty charmed life and never really had to ever worry too much. Unfortunately, my parents are the kind of people to make a mountain out of a molehill and in my youth I had a tendency to do the same thing. Now, I’m more grounded and thankfully can recognize real problems when they spring up, I have my wife to thank for that. Some people need a good partner to show them the way, she did that for me and I’m forever grateful.
Having children, buying a home, moving into a managerial position within a corporation … these things all come with a price tag, growing the fuck up. I’m happy that I’ve never felt as old as I am. Not that 34 is old, but it’s adulthood in all its glory without question.
Mentally I’ve prepared myself for the responsibilities I’ve assumed in the past couple of years, but it always surprises me when I feel like I don’t feel like I’ve done enough or get blue when I think that I’m not doing something right in life.
I wish for a lot. I had a promising career as a visual designer that didn’t play out like I’d hoped but I still have a definite love for the craft and am confident that I can hold my own. My most recent life discovery is that while you make plans for your own life-life, in turn, makes plans for you. It’s hard to realize that when you’ve got undying hopes and a love for something. It gets easier when you realize that you’ve got more time than you think to change life’s little unfortunate plans if they don’t jive with your own.