Tag Archives: Death comes to the office

Death comes to the office – Chapter One

As the day neared its end, Gertrude wondered whether she might make it home in time to see tonight’s ‘Dancing with the Stars,’ her favorite television show, but everyone in the office seemed determined to make her late with their bleeding from the eyes and ears and such. She was, however, determined. A little known fact about copier toner is that it can be fashioned into a wonderful makeshift second skin with just the right amount of heat. Sadly, if you apply too much heat it’ll seal you up tighter than a steak in butcher’s wrap and you’ll suffocate in around sixty seconds, which is something people typically try to avoid at the office, and especially when you’re trying to get home to watch television.

The thoughts that kept going through Gertrude’s mind as she entered the final figures for next week’s audit weren’t that the company is most certainly going to be seized and quite possibly a good majority of the company’s senior management were guilty of a great many major felonies, up to, but not including possession of rhino horns and anabolic steroids, but that she couldn’t remember whether or not she had bought cat food the night before on the way home. Since she couldn’t remember, she’d have to stop at the convenience store around the corner from her building and get some to be sure she wasn’t out. This would make her later than expected to get home to her favorite program cause it’s not like she could call her cat to confirm he had food or not.

At this point she was starting to panic. Her boss was late in turning in his figures for the audit and he was the last one left who needed to turn them in. Little did she know, there was much more in store for her than accounting figures.