So really, there’s apparently a time in your life where all things come together whether you like it or not. The past, the present and the future all converge into one big pile of fluffy somethingorother and you’re not sure what utensil to pull out. I’m not exactly having a mid-life crisis or anything but the past three months have sure been a whirlwind and I’m very thankful for my sanity–and as always, my wonderful wife–cause this wouldn’t be easy otherwise.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m actually happier than I’ve been in a long time and certainly don’t regret anything that has happened in the past three months, but one small event that took place this past weekend made me think about things pretty hard. Allow me to sum up.

I lost touch with a high school friend some six years ago due to a number of reasons, primarily that it seemed I wanted to grow up and he didn’t. That friend is now engaged to be married and hopefully preparing to take some serious steps into adulthood since he mentioned that he and his bride-to-be are thinking about having children in a short amount of time. Side note: why is it so much more difficult to end a platonic friendship than a romantic one? There was a period in my life when I wanted to pretend that everyone I hung out with before the age of 26 didn’t exist and that everything post wife was it. I’m fatalistic and lazy with relationships anyway, what would it harm? Well, a lot.

I have a new view of someone else in my life that leaves me with a horrible feeling of despair and even fear. In the past year, this person has changed in my eyes to the point that I don’t see him the way I used to, and it hurts– a lot. I’m sad that this person can’t enjoy his life and all he’s worked for but instead seems to spend his days living in turmoil or some kind of mysterious shame. Should I continue on with my view that friends are disposable and that the past is something that shouldn’t be revisited– at least in one form or another–I could become this person very easily. I don’t want that at all and hope sincerely that my friend can find his way.

This is by no means an acceptance of past acquaintances back into my life, but my willingness to accept that I am as much a part of other people’s lives as they are a part of mine. As I’ve had a generally charmed life, I’d like to think that there’s not much that can be harmed by inviting the past over for a cup of coffee every now and then–but I’m letting it sit at the end of very long table and getting a butler.

Everything else that has come together recently has been the most fantastic, albeit challenging, set of tasks to come my way in some time. There are few people who’s opinion of me I value greatly–and they know who they are–watch out cause I intend to make you smile, big time.